self healing Monday

I tried to create a guided meditation to helpme with this - and didnt succeed until after I had done the session. I'm not that good with technology sadly.

However I have done a self healing session. Nothing spectacular - but it felt better than my previous attempts. I light a candle and have incense burning. And this time I remembered to take off my jewelery - which I forgot before . I try to switch on my reiki by lighting a candle in my mind.

I felt the normal tingling in my hands and feet - and this time I was aware of tingling in the palms of my hands as well in the fingers. I am guessing that is a good sign.

I didnt feel or see anything special - but I did dimly see an eye - but nowhere as clear as it was during the attunement. And no colours either .

I can't really say I am aware of reiki flow. I cant really say I am aware of any huge improvemnt in my IBS but my back does feel better.

I am not really into a routine with self healing yet. I am still a little tense about keeping vanishing while Tony is up and around. I will probably relax and do better with my meditation when I am doing it in what I think of as 'my' time. I must add I have no reason to think Tony minds at all! I am just a real worry guts!

New thinking/

It says in the manual that after attunemnet some people find themselves thinking ina new way or with a new belief system.

This journal is to record my progress as I practice reiki so it seems appropraite to record here an insight I have gained today.

I went to see Edna today and came away feeling emotional - angry and upset. But I decided to try and listen to the voices and learn what they are trying to tell me.

I have come to the conclusion that I am going to learn something from this situation - something that I will able to use in some way in the future. Something that will redeem what seems to be a pointless tragedy

The secondary insight is that maybe if I think hard enough, I will find out I learned something from Alan's tragedy that can be useful.

Food for much thought and meditation

Reiki as part of my life

I keep 3 blogs. My first blog (changing life and times) is all about how I coped with the challenging events of last year. Life is still challenging so it is still going. Its main focus is my health and my struggle to lose weight. The second is about how things go with Edna. I started that so my first blog didnt become overwhelmed with Edna. My third blog (this one) was started because I wanted somewhere to record any psychic stuff. At times the three blogs cross over. Today is one of those days . I feel it worth posting the beggining of todays entry for 'changing life and times' here.

"I got frustrated and annoyed with myself yesterday when my reiki meditation didnt go well. With some help I worked out that a bit of me was angry that I was giving myself something else to do. Do I really have time to learn about reiki when I have to work, do things for Edna , want to spend quality time with those I love....................

The answer is reiki is all about good health and balance. It is SO much more than just the mystical laying on of hands to treat an illness. It is also all about the health of the practitioner. In a way I have been trying to carry out the 5 principals of Reiki for 3 years without realising it.

This blog has been about my health - both physical and mental - during challenging times. Times are still challenging. I have to go and see Edna today and already I can feel my stomach tying itself up in knots as I wonder what I will find when I get there.

I need to be healthy to cope with everything.'


It was a revelation how much of what I already did and thought fitted into reiki. Whether I ever practice as a reiki therapist is irrelevant. I need reiki in my life to stay healthy and cope with my responsibilities.

Its still quite early and I havent meditated yet. I will make an entry about that later

Improvment

I meditated and tried self healing for about 5 minutes before I came to bed tonight, I feel it went much better. I 'saw' more colours during my meditation this time and it felt as if it went better.

I will re-read the manual again and make sure I have it al straight in my mind what I should be doing. Hopefully tomorrow will be a lot better.

First attempt at self healing

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised or downhearted to report that my first attempt at self healing was quite unspectacular. Nothing really happened. I certainly didn't see or feel anything abnormal apart from the normal tingling in my hands and feet.

If you could do it brilliantly at the first attempt, you wouldn't need to keep practising

I do feel quite emotional which could be the result of the meditation - or just my disappointment at what feels like a lack of success.

It is so tough to meditate without guidance. I have tried to find a way to make my own track - but can't and that annoys me as well.

But 'For today do not be angry' Getting annoyed wont help me.

I forgot to take off my jewelery. I forgot to visualize a switch to turn the reiki on. I will have another go this evening and see if the meditation goes any better

Premonition?

I've just remembered something that happened yesterday. Shortly after Sue said she had been told when Edna might die, we discussed whether I would REALLY want to know. I said it would depend on the time involved ' .........but if it was only 2 months I would at least know I could cope with that'

I picked 2 months out thin air - I thought. But its a funny time period to chose so I am recording it as a possible premonition and hoping I am wrong.

The reiki way of life

I have read through the manual again - not worrying too much about the history of how we got to where we are (or where I am?) with Reiki. So different practitioners have adapted and expanded on their practice. Big deal Conventional medicine does that all the time and no-one would try to throw doubt on conventional medicine as a result. But I can easily see conventional practitioners using that as a means to cast doubt on reiki.

One of my pharmacy colleages made what I thought was a scpetical comment about reiki to my FB status where I mentioned going for reiki training. I replied diplomatically and his rseponse was a great surprise. ' Cochrane says it works - I was encouraging you' Cochrane is the bible of evidenced based medicine that all conventional practitioners rely on. He also posted the link to review shat showed a positive effect of reiki and other hands on techniques in arthritic pain. And the moral to that tale is I must NOT assume all my colleagues have closed minds. It was also good to see some scientific backing for reiki. I must ackowledge the needs of my rational sceptical scientific mind.

I think what spoke most clearly to me from the manual was the expanded section on the 5 principals of reiki. So much of what I read there I could relate to my McKenna training. It all fits and thats why it all feels so right.

I havent meditated or done any self healing today yet. I did try last night but I got twitchy again and I decided (rightly ot wrongly) that trying self healing last night after such an intensive day wasn't the right thing to do.

However what I have done is prepare a space where I can meditate properly maybe with incense or an oil burner to add ambience. The oil burner is dual purpose as I presume the tea light flame would. as act as a candle. The tidying up was HIGHLY therapeutic ( life laundry??) as well as being good exercise.

I intend to meditate properly later today.

I didnt sleep well last night mainly because I spent te night chasing TC (our cat) round the bed because he seemed totally unable to leave me alone and insited on sitting on me however many times I pushed him off. As a result I woke with pains in my back. Not my normal back pain - this was deep in my muscles. I did wonder if it could be healing reaction - but its more likely it was just thanks to an obstinate cat. He was far more obstinate than he has been. Whether that is the sort of change Sue suggested I might see in the cats behavior round me I don't know. Felix (our other cat) is as standoffish with me as he always been as far as I can see.

I will make an entry about my meditation and self healing session later.