Images and metaphors

I can't remember if I recorded it on here but I had a waking vision the other day that gave me the image of a dove. I know I blogged on ere about the meditation that gave me the colour yellow and about the image of a butterfly.

The butterfly represents metamoprhosis, the dove intellectual and spiritual metamorphosis. Both apt for my current situation and plans.

This morning I did my card picks. The Tarot card was the 9 of cups (now is a good time for fulfilment of dreams if you work at it)

Then I picked 3 cards to try to get a combined message one each from Ask your guides, Angels and Fairies

I got rest - which is clearly what I need at the moment. Solar Plexus chakra - it is safe to take charge of your life in positive ways and Happy ever after - meaning obvious. The colour for the solar plexus chakra is yellow.

There does seem to be a coherent message coming through. And it is a good message.

Yellow

Yesterday I did the Eamonn Downy Sweet Surrender meditation. The colour I got clearly in the final part was 'yellow' and the image that came to my mind was of the sun giving light warmth to us. I felt this could be an analogy of me as a light worker, giving to those who need or want it.

Its a nice thought

I did random card picks today for the first time in some time. I only used my decks and I got the King of Wands, Law of Attraction, Boredom and raising your standards.

The message I get is that I need to become more like the 'can do' King of Wands. The other 3 cards in their very different ways all speak of changes in my life, dissatisfaction with my current life and of being led down a different path, surrounded by different people and living my dream. But unless I have the 'can do' attitude it won't happen.

On Friday when I left Solihull some of the girls had clubbed together and got me a small fob watch of the type nurses wear. It is in the shape of a butterfly. I forgot until I shuffled the cards today that the back of the fairy deck is a butterfly. Hmmmm coincidence?? Possibly, probably - but it is a nice omen.

A dove

I had a waking vision last night. Unusually it wasn't first thing in the morning but when I woke in the middle of the night. I still wonder if I really AM awake - but I am 99% sure I am. However even if I am asleep these are unusually vivid memorable dreams that I never had before I started actively developing my psychic abilities. And they still seemed to be linked with my being psychically active. In this case I have been meditating regularly.

The images were goldish on a muddy brownish background. Much more muted colours than I have seen before. The images were muddled but I know I saw a face. I also saw winged things including one that was a stylized dove in flight. I also saw symbols that I think were writing - but nothing I could decipher.

Memo to self keep a notebook by the bed so you can record these at the time. 6 hours later after some more sleep the memory is not as clear as it was.

What doe these mean? Is the dove a significant image?

An extraordinary meditation

OK deep breath time. Make of this what you will. I decided to do another card meditation but being a bit disorganised I ended up taking the tarot deck upstairs to pick the card. I put them on the floor by the chair. I went through my usual candle incense and symbols routine reallised I hadn't got my iPod and decided I would meditate in silence. I did my reiki principles and my prayers, then decided I would pick my tarot card. One card had fallen - I presume it was the top one, so I looked at and it was The Priestess (major arcana again!) However as it clearly had just fallen off the top I decided to check if it WAS my card for today by seeing if I got more of a buzz of it than the rest of the deck. I clearly did so I stuck with that card. She is the third of the major arcana (although not number 3 as the Fool is zero) and my birth number is 3 so I feel an affinity for The Priestess as well as The Empress the 'official' card number 3.

Fort some reason instead of seeing myself in my safe glade I decided to use the image of the candle flame and it became a door through which I stepped into utter blackness. I was aware of Thomas and Eli with me. I looked around and saw a light a long way away and we headed towards it. Then the Priestess was sitting there on her bench and I and I asked 'Who are you?" She replied 'I am you' so I sat on her bench for a short time. Then I got up and she sat back down and I decided I wasn't quite ready for that yet. She vanished and the three of us moved on towards the light again - which was still a long way away. Then Tony was there and he hugged me. We moved on towards the light again and I found myself repeating over and over again 'I am not afraid' Except I realised I was repeating that because I WAS afraid the potential power reiki and psychic abilities give me. Then we were traveling though an area where reiki was pouring down. So we stayed there for a bit and from the sudden thirst I developed I was channeling We left the reiki area and the light was still a long way away until I realised I need to use reiki regularlly to deal with my fear and lets be honest self hatred. Suddenly the light was right in front of and it was another door. I stepped through into my safe glade. I decide to self treat while I was still in the glade - not for long but when I could see the purple light rotating I decided to stop and leave the meditation.

At one point ,I dont remember when , I thought about Colin and realised he looked a little like the new vicar at St Mary's. Now if I find his name is Colin I will be VERY amazed.

It was the kind of meditation that I really need to think about a lot. But one message I did clearly get was that I need to embrace darkness and silence. Last night my bedside radio was playing up so when I woke up at 2.15 I didnt keep the radio on. I slept like a log the rest of the night.

I can't wait for the next investigation when I intend to try a lone vigil in the dark and total silence. I will try channeling reiki and see what I get. After all the glass at the Witch did say I worked with spirit by channeling reiki. If that opens up my psychic eyes and ears who know what I could see or hear.

The Hierophant

I meditated today - having missed a lot days lately and I do feel the worse for it. I decided to do a card meditation and ended up with Hierophant. To me the card represents a teacher imparting knowledge and I found myself asking 'Who is my Hierophant? I got the answer Tony. The meaning in the book is that the card represents the desire for spiritual progress. Well that is something I do want to do. The idea that Tony can help me is logical because he has progressed further with his psychic development than I have. But this isnt just about PSYCHIC progress its about SPIRITUAL progress and I suspect I need to look deeper for the meaning.

I did some self healing - not for long but I felt I needed something.

Today I am going down to meet Jane Diane and Anne for our second Taylor Day. I am apprehensive as I always am when a family visit is imminent. I feel I ought to take my crystals with me as I am wondering if I am going to give reiki to someone during the day. That would be nice.

Here's hping its a good day

Wheel of Fortune

I have been lax in my meditations for a few days. I have too tired mentally and physically to meditate fruitfully. This morning got myself organsed and have managed a meditation this morning. I decided to do a random tarot pick and meditate on that card. I got the wheel of fortune.

The figure in the middle is Fortune - and wears purple - the colour of wisdom and of the crown chakra. The man at the bottom wears grey - presumably depicitng how he feels but the other three figures are all colourful. yellow is the common colour - solar plexus chakra? Ib fact the figure on the top is wearing yellow (gold?) and white - the alternative colours for the crown chakra. The ascending figure is predominantly green (heart chakra) while the figure on the way down is mainly red. While I can see that you need heart to climb up I dont immediately see why the sacral chakra should be linked to the descent. Maybe I am wrong in linking the colours to the chakras - or maybe I need to learn more about chakras.

It would be easy to say the fortune is random that it is a cycle. But I know that you can change your own fortune. I think how you deal with changing fortune determines how long it takes for the cycle to complete.

Why did I get this card today? Obviously I am on the wheel. But where am I? Is my instinctive response linking the colours to the chakra's the real message? A sign that I need to focus on my spiritual exercises to improve my fortune?

It is possible. I know I feel working as a pharmacist is literally soul destroying. And I did the whole soul destroyed thing years ago and and am NOT going back. Its a good a message as any.

The meaning in the book is that my circumstances are changing - well thats apt and true. It also speaks about control and lack of control. Its all about how you use the opportunities you get given.

The meaning of the images in the book is blind fortune (wearing the colour of wisdom) and the four phases of life we are all subject to. Strife poverty good fortune and opportunity.

I intend to make the most of my opportunites. Is South Bank and opportunity I need to take?

seances

Over the past 2 days I have been at some very different seances using physical mediumship with some widely differing results.

On Thursday we went to the senace at the Witch - partly to see if Isabelle would come through again which would have been truly awesome. She didnt. However what did happen was very interesting. The medium leading us (Kelly) was trying to communicate with someone she beleived was the mother of one of the other people round the table. Kathleen was clearly NOT taking everything Kelly was saying and looked puzzled. I got a name -Rosemary - whihc it turns out was her sister's name. Then a little later I asked if her mother's name was Mary and her face lit up like a belisha beacon. I felt humbled to get such a response for saying something so simple. We also did a oija board session which was interesting especially as Claire Green appeared to come through with a message for her family. But I remain sceptical about messages obtained this way and feel we have a real dilemma about what is anything to say to anyone.

Then later in the cellar Tony chanelled again and it was weird looking at him. I knew Tony was sitting stil - but I coudl see him rocking slightly and shifting his hands. And the person he chanelled was very nervous. yet again the story Tony got was corroborated by Karl and Shaz as one they had before.

I left feeling exhilerated and with a real feeling of progress in my own abilities and the feeling we really had encounted something paranormal.

Fast frward 24 hours and we went to the Falstaff's experience. We had been told this was really actoive and that we needed to have our protection up. So I was ready for anything. There were 16 of us in the group . After the lit walk round, and the walk round with the medium we were able to do some lone vigils. Nothing really mind blowing came through. certainly nothing that fitted with anything verifiable.

Then we were spilt into 2 groups. Our group included a group of 4 all newbies one of whom was ultra sceptical who seemd to have gone to the karl Beattie school of ghost hunting. Tom Morley (the medium) led us in 'human dowsing - the 'yes/no' technique I learned at Paul McKenna's workshop. The theory in the paranormal as that in that state a spirit can enter your aura and affect you by making you sway and move and even by raising your arms. Not much to my surprise since I have felt wobbly in ordinary seances I was quite affected by this as was Tony. When Tom was debriefing us the ultra secptical man said it looked as if we were responding to hypnosis. Since I know how close guided meditation is to hypnosis I can see what he meant . I am not sure whether wjat I did was 'spirit' led or' me' led.

Then we moved to be led by Alison to do a oiuja board session. The other gorup got really good results but we didn't. We could get moevment but all our questions got the answer no. Then the sceptical guy said he thought I was pushing the planchet. So I stepped out - and actually left the group early to go back to the base for some fresh air. The room felt really flat - and to be honest I was upset. I know I wasn't conciously pushing the planchet - but I did wonder if I had been subconsciously pushing it.

When everyone else came back for a break mr sceptic and is 2 companions left the event - and I found out Alsion and Tom were both annoyed about this groups attitude and Alison was very annoyed that I had been accused of faking the planchet.

The last session we did as a group in the seance room )an area where I had felt activity during the medium walk round) and as a group we got energy gooing and got some very interesting things to happen - including a big heavy table moving quite a lot. The glass was also VERY active.

So did the group of sceptics actually damp down the energy and prevent things from happening? Was that why we kept getting 'no' on the ouija board? And is there a psychological reason why the remaining 12 of us - all open minded at the least - could get more activity?

The contrast between the two events - and even the two halves of the same event - is amazing and has me wondering more about the psychological aspects of investigation. I am not going to lie and say the attitude of that sceptic didn't spoil Falstaff's for me. It did. Falstaff's was not the exciting place I thought it would me. But I would like to go back and see if its better another night. But I am going to see if it is possible to verify the existence of a Hubert K (King? Knighton?) with 6 children aho died in 1664 at the age of 43 - who was the person who came through when the glass really got going in the seance room at the end.

But in the end does it matter if an investigation goes pearshaped? Having found I did reiki one of the participants asked where I practiced and I think would have booked an appointment if she lived anywhere local to me. My reiki is still very real.